This article originally appeared in the September/October 2020 issue of the Ontario Medical Review magazine.
The year started with near biblical events of fire, flood, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, locusts, anthrax and of course COVID-19. Month after month, we have been challenged to rise again, to push forward, to support each other and to survive. People around the world, and here at home, have suffered great losses, great pain. It seems disrespectful to complain, to be ungrateful. So, many of us stay quiet as we carry our burdens of smaller losses, and smaller pain.
But it’s important to acknowledge the struggles that we endure, to grant them space and make our peace with them, so that we can move forward, lighter. So, I have been asking colleagues, what is the hardest part of 2020 that you are loath to admit?
For me, it is this year’s President’s Tour. I ran for the Presidency before COVID-19 was a household term, before we saw Milan and New York brought to their knees, before we grieved for colleagues working with insufficient PPE and were dying. I ran for the Presidency to be a strong voice for members as we hit another negotiating year, and pushed forward with governance transformation.
I knew it would be hard. I knew it would cost me. I knew it would pull me away from clinical work and education duties, both of which are dear to me. I knew that it would pull me away from my kids. But I was prepared for that, because I believe that we must work towards a better world. I could make a difference.
The time spent away from my kids would be worth it, when I could take them on the Tour, show them parts of Ontario they haven’t seen; have my eldest meet some of the docs in some of the communities we serve. My kids would understand what it means to put others ahead of yourself. They would get an education that school could never provide.
I planned to go into medical schools and meet our next generation, and show them that a single female physician, early career, two kids, could be at the front of leading change.
I planned to go into our rural communities, and thank those docs who do it all, acknowledging the challenge therein, and the privilege of being a specialist in a downtown core, with many others to ask for advice.
I planned to go north, and hear from those serving the indigenous communities what they needed to serve a population so vastly underserved.
I know the Presidency is a spokesperson job. But I wanted to hear your stories. To take them with me and bring them to life. To honour your lives and your careers, and highlight them.
So, as we start the virtual President’s Tour, and strive to connect with each other across miles and screens, I will take a moment to grieve the loss, to acknowledge the struggle and to move forward. Because at the end of the day, we have work to do.
What loss are you grieving? Let’s start a Twitter conversation, and make the world a smaller, more empathic place. @SamHillMD.
Dr. Samantha Hill
OMA President